
If you get aboard a Lagos bus and after a while you
hear the conductor call out “under!”, “Killer!”, ”
Masha!” don’t panic, it is not the beginning of
madness, he is just calling out bus-stops; so where
is your stop?
There are so many humorous things that take place
while traveling on a Lagos commercial bus, certain
things that happen or that are said, are just enough
to keep you laughing if you take a second thought
at them.
For me the bus-stops in Lagos and the way these
conductors call them out, gets me laughing always.
So you have bus-stop like “Westminster”
pronounced as “West Minister” and you can’t but
laugh to tears.
There many more bus-stops which i find funny,
either in their pronunciation or in the meaning of
their names as it were.
Perhaps I should give you some heads-up, every
major landmark in Lagos eventually is used as a
bus-stop, and in the case of no major building/
edifice; then the nearest Iroko tree becomes the
bus-stop for the area.
This theory holds majorly for residents in the
mainland, as the Lagos-Island tends to have a
good number bus-stops with straight names.
Without spoiling the fun, here are some of the
craziest and funniest names i have found of the lot
that exist around the Lagos megalopolis.
Come “along”, yes, ‘along’ is yet another bus-stop’s
name.
Cemetery bus stop
There are so many cemetery bus-stops across
Lagos. The simple rationale for the bus-stop name,
being that the cemetary located around the corner
is about the most popular place to reckon with
within the area. Seriously, I mean, how can you say
you live at “Cemetery bus stop”?
Moshalashi
Moshalashi means mosque, and there are major
mosques in virtually every part of Lagos. You can
rarely go to on any Local government are which
doesn’t have a Moshalashi- bus stop.
Mechanic bus stop
There is one just after Okokomiko and like the
other bus-stops, just for the mere fact that a group
of automobile mechanics make one spot their
workshop, it automatically becomes a bus-stop.
Tell me, what can be easier to describe than a
group of men with shirts soiled with so much
grease.
Abattoir
I asked someone recently, where do you live and
he said “abattoir” and I could not hold back my
laughter, apparently he was referring to the
popular bus-stop around the Abule Egba area of
Lagos, where the Lagos abattoir is located.
Church bus stop- Along Mile 2
The name says it all, you can already guess what
inspired this bus-stop located along Agboju Mile 2
(Badagry expressway).
Coconut bus stop- Along Mile 2
The presence of a long row of coconut trees gave
rise to the name of this bus-stop located on your
way to Mile 2. Infact, you will hear the conductors
call out “Mile-2 Coconut!”, on their trips from
Oshodi through iyana-isolo and down past Cele-
bus stop.
Cele bus stop- Along Mile 2
Lagosians have an abbreviation for the Celestial
churches, and that is “Cele” and that is the concept
behind naming this bus-stop after some celestial
church within.
Takuti Jesu- Ajah
It remains somewhat unclear to me why this bus-
stop was named “Taku ti Jesu”, a name which
basically means never letting go of Jesus. Perhaps
some new form of admonition, so don’t let go till
you get what you want. Somebody, must have read
Jacob’s story.
Mongoro- Along Oshodi- Egbeda road
Now this is one very funny one. Just like coconut,
this is supposed to be Mango bus-stop, but the
conductors never fail to call it “mongoro”, I can’t
forget how much i laughed the first time I
deciphered it.
Ile-epo- Along Ejigbo-Ikotun road
Just along the Ejigbo-Ikotun road, is this bus-stop
whose name is derived from the mere fact that a
“filling-station” ( fuel station) is sited there. Ile-epo
literally mean, house-of-oil (a gas station).
7/8- Along Airport Road
For as long as I have known this bus-stop, it has
fascinated me, as I have tried tirelessly to solve the
maths behind its name. Please if you have a clue,
then let us know. Same goes for the bus-stop
named 23-24.
Onigbongbo- Maryland
In all honesty, I can tell you for real what the name
entail. However, I am more concerned with the way
it sounds when pronounced. Go on, try it, O-ni-
gbon-gbo. Don’t bite your tongue.
Onipanu- Along Yaba-Ikorodu road
Unlike Onigbongo, I think Onipanu means some
one who trades in aluminum and building
materials. So you can be sure that there is/was a
popular “onipanu” to earn it a place as a popular
bus-stop in Lagos.
Alakara bus stop
If you understand yoruba well enough, then you
will understand that this bus-stop was named after
someone, who most likely is a woman that sells
“bean-cakes” locally called “akara”.
Ogolonto- Ikorodu area
Like O-ni-gbon-gbo, I know little of O-go-lon-to, I
can only say that it is located along the famous
Ikorodu road. Ogolonto just has a peculiar way it
sounds in the ears and as each syllable drops,
smile from ear to ear.
These are but a few of the very crazy bus-stop
names in Lagos. We want to hear from you, what is
the name of your bus stop or the nearest one to
where you live or place of work.
Let us know if they are funny and crazy and if you
will be proud to tell some outside you live there.
Meanwhile, Christmas is almost here again, so you
need to beware of certain spots within Lagos.
Credit: Soonest Nathaniel/NAIJ